Its such a miracle how God uses the simplest silliest things *laughs* to inspire us and leave us perplexed at his wisdom. That was what happened with this post.

My featured guest blogger this week is; Ebisidor Ann Azu.

BioEbisidor Ann has been a blogger for some time now, she is also a teen coach, mentor, author and the mouthpiece of The Siaisiai Ebisidor Foundation. (A movement that puts smiles on the faces of children as we put them in classrooms). She is passionate about healthy relationships, people living their best life the way God intended and lifting children up to love and growth. She blogs passionately at you should go see what she’s up to.

This is what she shares;

Can I have a condom please?
If you had bagged some negative acts/dramas last year 2019, fall in here and read this piece. Trust me, it’s not that deep but it’s a must read so as to have a better 2020.

When Chika, reached out to me in respect to featuring me on her blog, the issue on getting what to write on bothered me. I thought to myself,what on earth can I possibly write on; it just popped up to write on emotional condom.

As we know that condom is a cool protection used when having sex and it’s basically against sexually transmitted diseases or unwanted pregnancy as the case may be.

Today, I’ll be writing on emotional condom. Protecting yourself from emotional stress,issues, dramas this year.

An emotional condom is the mental parallel to the physical condom – an actual condom keeps your sexual organs from getting damaged, an emotional condom keeps your heart and mind from getting damaged.

Last year, I personally did not use this condom and a whole lot happened to me… Trust me, I know better now. It is my responsibility to get an emotional condom for myself to have a cool year. You should too!

*An Emotional condom in respect to relationship (Friendship or dating)*

When you don’t trust a friend enough to let them get close to you.

When to wear a “friendship condom”?

When you are still friends but you don’t open up to them or get close emotionally in fear of them being fake with bad intentions. You must be careful trust me.

When to wear a “dating condom”?

My darling, you must be more careful. You should know by now with all the experiences you’ve had that you’re not a trash spot. If they are not making conscious effort to be in your life, please leave them with no second thought. It’s your life you know. Better to be alone than be emotionally messed up.

I remember a friend of mine that cried a number of times because the love cards did not favour her… The only advice I could think of giving her was to allow love be for now, be whole as a single, find new ways to loving herself more and somehow, love would find her. This worked for me though and I pray it does for her.

Come to think of it, this piece is not strictly on emotions only, you can apply it to physical, psychological, and financial aspects of your life. The most important thing is that the condom is used.

This year 2020,don’t go everywhere…

Don’t do everything…

Don’t allow everything…

Ensure that you are emotionally protected. Learn to say no when you need to.

Do not trade your happiness for anything.

Stay alone if it gives you peace of mind.

Read good books and keep good company.

Invest and help humanity this year.

From my janded empire,I wish you a 2020 of progress and good tidings. Cheers.

If this post has inspired you, don’t leave without dropping a lovely comment for Ebisidor and a comment to encourage others. God bless you. Hugs xoxo.


  1. Reigneth

    Wow! This is such a good read

  2. papilo ofeakwu boy

    aww thanks dearie…
    so true

    • Olabanji Ewenla

      Thank you so much Ann for this concise writeup😄

      Emotional Condom!
      Emotional Condom!!!😂😂😂
      This title alone already got me really curious about it & am super glad I read it.
      I personally sum it up as GUARD YOUR HEART WITH ALL DILIGENCE….

      Question! Question!! Question!!!
      – Just like physical condoms sometimes get weak or worn out during intense performance & then the unexpected happens (Unwanted pregnancy or unwanted disease😂), emotional condoms can get weak too – life can throw the craziest experience at us ….
      How do we manage such situation effectively in times like that so that we don’t end up doing or becoming or going into unwanted things like depression?
      In between, Chika I love the blog revamp. This is really a wonderful upgrade👌
      Well-done dear, keep up the excellent work👏

      • Ebijanded

        Hello Olabanji,
        Thanks for coming through with your comment and question.
        Truth is,life still plays itself cool or hard on us even if we try so hard. My sincere advise to you is that no matter what happens to you as you journey through life should not be as a result of the fact that you looseguarded in any aspect of life.

        When you want to have sex with a condom, you have at the back of your mind that ‘ hey,I no wan carry belle o or give person belle o…’ or ‘ I no wan get disease o’ , that way you stay calm and do it gently. Trying to do hard hard and forget that the things can disappoint is only at your own detriment.

        Relating this to life, protect yourself well. Let me use a popular line “shine your eye well well”

        I love the scripture you made reference to.

        Depression is real I know but with your emotional condom, you’ll just choose your battles wisely. Peradventure,the condom fails, clean the mess and use another emotional condom. Most importantly, never stay without the condom. Thanks dear

        • chiqj

          You hit the nail here Ebi. You’re just amazing. Olabanji I hope your question have been properly answered . And thank you for your observation on the blog change. I truly appreciate. Much love xoxo.

          • Olabanji Ewenla

            Yes o. Ann answered it perfectly well👌
            Thank you Thank you😄

        • Olabanji Ewenla

          “… no matter what happens to you as you journey through life should not be as a result of the fact that you looseguarded in any aspect of life…”

          This☝ really got to me!!!
          I am summing this up as👇

          Thank you very much Ann!
          You are an insightful person💯
          We should connect if you don’t mind.

          • Ebijanded

            Awww,let’s connect then.

  3. Ann

    Beautiful… I enjoy reading this piece.

  4. Bright Duweni

    “emotional condom” is such a captivating title. I agree with you Janded, we need to protect ourselves eeeehhh, that’s the only way our piece of mind would be guaranteed.

  5. Ebijanded

    I love this piece… hehehe

    Weldone Chika,you write so good. Hugs

    • chiqj

      Oh God!! Guys she wrote this piece and she’s telling me well done. You see why I say she’s got a pure heart. Thank you for inspiring the readers with your words. You write amazingly excellent. Love and hugs❤ xoxo.

  6. Iboro

    Very captivating title. Weldone ebijanded, weldone Chika. I celebrate you both

    • chiqj

      Thank you so much Iboro. You’re such a sweetheart. Love and hugs xoxo

  7. Adophus Tamal

    Hmm mm. …I’ll buy the blog with words should I be allowed to say all I have to with respect to the above piece. That nonetheless is a good read. I did get a lot and girl…the title is as appealing as GOT in that you just can’t wait to view or review it “Emotional Condom”..unique tittle I must say

    Good one and more grace to you both…cheers!!

    • chiqj

      Oh wow!! Thank you for such generous words. All thanks to our Guest Blogger who gave it a very captivating title, that I agree with you. Much love xoxo

  8. Faith

    Wowwww, I’m sure gonna put on an “Emotional Condom” this year…..much love to Ebijanded

  9. Peter Uma

    in the past, I allowed myself to be easily accessible to everyone and that caused me alot. your post is really an affirmation to the decision I made and it is really better to be alone than to be in the company of toxic people……Thanks for the Piece

    • chiqj

      Yes it is. Is okay if you protect yourself emotionally but don’t loose yourself in the process. Just continue to be your real self and you’ll find your real people. Love and hugs xoxo

      • Lovely piece! Well done to these great ladies Ebi and Chika♥️♥️

        • chiqj

          Thank you so much Blessing for your kind words and support. Love xoxo

  10. Udoka Ozieh

    This is apt, timely and instructive. Great writing from a fine mind. Thank you

  11. Eddy

    It’s really nice, well done to u two

    • chiqj

      Thank you so much and we’re glad you stopped by. Hugs xoxo

  12. Queenie

    This is a wonderful piece.. Kudos to mama Vera aka janded Queen and chi_baby..

    • chiqj

      Thank you Queen. We are glad you found it relatable. Love and hugs xoxo

  13. papilo ofeakwu boy

    aww I must say this is law of honour, two great individuals Ebi and chi congratulating them selfs in a matured way, I forgot to put on my reading condom and I burst with laughter…
    you guys are great 👍

    • chiqj

      😂😂😂😂😂 “reading condom”. You just cracked me up. Thank you Papilo.

  14. Success

    This is such a nice reminder for me,it was very helpful… getting a condom emotionally, financially,and all other aspects it needed😉😍😍 thanks

    • Ebijanded

      You’re welcome my darling. Glad you enjoyed the piece.

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