Birthday gifts aren’t enough

All i ever wanted was for her to affirm those words to my ears.
Those emotions of love i showered upon her to never be ending.
For her to see the good that i am and i do.
To feel that she’s my world and that i want everything for her.
To never let my shoulder weaken in the face of the world. For her to see that our relationship is a gift and not the birthday gift she gives me every year. Not out of feeling but out of obligation.

But all i ever got was she affirming those words to the ears of others.
Giving those emotions to those who could give her something in return.
Never ending complains of my failures and my victory was showered on me.
My good was replaced with greed.
My feelings were trampled upon and my ego bruised.
I wanted her love and respect but i got her threats.

Then she came running back when she needed the care.
In the long run, no one had ever given her the attention she got from me.
When she missed the sweet melodies of companionship, she relaxed.
When she needed the love and encouragement she focused on me.
When she needed the advice, i was the only one available.

Why me now? I asked. Tired of the back and forth.

I’m i so ugly? say it!
Do you hate my family? speak up!
What is the problem? Am i the problem?…

You never talk. You pretend like everything is alright.
And all you do is dismiss me and belittle me
I am human and I’m not God. I cant be everything you want me to be. I can only be me and me is enough to love you.

You give all your time to others because they’ve built an empire for themselves.
Because they can easily take you to la la land with the swipe of their fingers.
Because they tell you anything just to make you feel special.
Whereas the real man is the one standing right before you who’s not afraid to tell you the truth even when it hurts.

I’m not a weak man. I’m a lover.
A man in love with his woman.

A man who doesn’t just want the universe but a man who wants the universe with a special someone in it to share it with him.
A man who wants to work hard for his wealth and power.

If that is not enough then leave.

Leave!

I want a woman who is deserving of me.

Not a woman who chooses to love me when its convenient for her.